Dear Baby Eva,
You finally are here! In just the short time you’ve been with us, your mom and dad have fallen in love with you. We are so grateful you are ours and can’t imagine life without you.
Doctor Judd told me that some people are great at having babies. Those people had their babies before their due date. Some people are good at having babies. Those people had their babies right around their due date. And some people aren’t particularly talented in that department overall and have their babies late, usually with a C-Section. That’s the category I was in.
So, we showed up on December 7, 2011 (6 days after your due date) at Orem Community Hospital. Upon the arrival, I was extremely excited. I was feeling great. I had makeup on, my hair was done, I just wanted to start of the experience feeling wonderful because I was unsure of what was going to happen in the next couple days. Your dad on the other hand was pretty exhausted. We didn’t plan it out quite perfectly and so you happened to be arriving right during his last week of school, in the middle of his final project deadlines.
Your dad got me all checked in, but after an hour of some paper work and getting me hooked up to the machines to measure my contractions and your heartbeat, he had to leave to get back to a final and a faculty review. Your grandma stayed with me as they gave me some sort of medicine to get things moving. All of the nurses doubted that it would actually work and so they scheduled a C-Section for the next morning. Within an hour or so, I started feeling some mild cramps. I asked for some ibuprofin. About thirty minutes later, that just wasn’t cutting it so I asked for some morphine. And just a short time after that, I was calling the nurse asking for the epidural. I had never felt such extreme pain. I wasn’t supposed to be getting out of bed, but I was so uncomfortable, I tried to move in any position to relieve it. They didn’t want to give me an epidural unless I was in labor, so they checked to see if I had progressed, and sure enough, in just a matter of hours, I was dilated to about 5 cm and 80% effaced. All the nurses were shocked, and so was my doctor. I got nervous that T.J. wasn’t there, so I texted him saying, COME RIGHT NOW NOW NOW! I’M IN LABOR!” He left before he had his faculty review and had to have his friend present his projects for him.
Anyway, around 8 pm (roughly 4 hours after they gave me the medicine) the anistesiologist gave me the epidural. About 8 minutes later, the pain was gone. It was incredible. Amazing. The best time of my life. I can’t say it enough. I was able to feel my stomach get tight for the contractions but not have any pain. I even got to sleep through the majority of the night.
At 4 am I woke up with really bad back aches. My mom told me she had back labor pains, so I figured that’s what I was experiencing… more epidural, please (your mom is a wimp). The nurse decided to check me again and it turned out I was 100% effaced and 8 cm dilated. The nurses kept saying, “Who would have ever thought! You were going to be our C-Section in the morning!” I was so grateful that I was going to be able to have you the normal way as I had planned and prepared for and knew that it was because of the many people who prayed and fasted for me the past week.
At 8 am, Dr. Judd came in to break my water. Boy, that was a weird experience. After this point, the doctor gave me pitocin to really get things to move along. This is when things got a little blurry, mostly because my epidural stopped working for some areas and so I was a wreck.
When you started to move on down, I could feel you… and it was not comfortable at all. For some people, the epidural numbs this, but it didn’t for me. It made me want to push but the nurse told me that I should try to hold off and let the contractions do most of the work. I kept freaking out because I thought you were coming, so I kept having the nurse check me. She probably was so annoyed by the end of it all because every five or ten minutes, I’d yell, “SHE’S HERE, I KNOW SHE’S COMING NOW!” She kept assuring me it was okay, but eventually the pain became so severe that we decided I would just start to push for some relief. Those next couple of hours were awful, I cried, I screamed, I even shouted, “GIVE ME A C-SECTION!” about a dozen of times. Around 11:00, I asked your dad to give me a blessing. It was short and sweet, I honestly don’t even remember what he said. But I do remember the peace that I felt. I knew everything was going to be okay, and best of all, I kept dozing off which would distract me.
Abruptly, around noon, the nurse woke me up and told me, “You need to get ready, she’s here.” I was so tired, I could barely open my eyes. The room became filled with a couple more nurses, a breathing specialist for you just in case you had any problems (you didn’t)… everyone except my doctor. My nurse kept calling him to tell him to get here, but he was across town at his office. I didn’t think I could wait for him to arrive, those next ten minutes seemed like eternity. Finally when he did arrive, he just strolled in like there wasn’t any rush and calmly, told me it was time to push.
You know, it’s amazing. At the time, labor was the most difficult thing I’d ever done. It was painful and it was emotional. I was so worn out and, in the end, I didn’t think I could actually do it.
Once the doctor told me to push, you were here within twenty minutes or so. The look on your dad’s face was a look I’ll never forget. He was in complete awe as he watched you come into the world. With a smile, he even teared up a bit. I wish I would have looked, I just was so tired I physically couldn’t move anymore. But there you were. Our little baby. The one we had dreamed about for the past 9 months. The little girl who would be ours forever.
As soon as they put your little body against my chest, all the memories of the pain went away. I mean, I remember what happened, I know deep down that it was really difficult that morning, but I can’t remember what it felt like. People told me that would happen and they were right. Holding you made everything worth it.
Through my time being pregnant and the delivery, I kept thinking about how you were a miracle. Everything about it, it just is incredible to me. You started so small in my belly and now, you are a little girl here in our home. This is truly what life is all about. You have brought the greatest happiness into our home and are a daily reminded to me of our Savior’s love.
Love,
Your Mother
Yesterday one of our friends told us that Darryl from The Office died.
