The Miracle on 34th Street
If you’re my friend on Facebook, you might have seen my desperate plea for help asking how to discipline my child when I’m out in public. Today Eva had one of the worst tantrums she’s ever had. As we were coming home on the train, I just thought, this is it. This is the WORST day I’ve had as a mom. There’s one other day that I think compares, when Eva was a month or two old, T.J. was in school, and Eva would not sleep and cried for hours one night. That was pretty bad. But at least I was at home, without all the judging eyes of NYC people around me.
Eva had one little outbreak in the subway on the way there, which is when I should have just gotten off the train, and got back on in the opposite direction to get back home. But I was determined to go and run my errand and not let my child run my life. I got her calmed down after a couple of minutes anyway, but it should have been my warning.
She did really great through the store, but when it was time to go home, she had a tantrum because she didn’t want to get back in her stroller to go home. After a couple minutes in the store with her on the ground in a full out tantrum, I gave in and said, “Fine, you can walk until we get out of the store.” I just couldn’t handle having her scream in there with everyone looking at us! All of these NYC with their NYC lifestyles, thinking something like, “That’s why you don’t get married so young and have children in your early twenties.” I wanted to yell back saying,
SHE’S NOT ALWAYS LIKE THIS, SHE’S USUALLY ADORABLE, I PROMISE!
So, like I said, I gave in. Let her walk next to me. But once I got outside I knew I needed to get her in the stroller. We were on 34rd and 6th. It’s crazy there. Eva needed to be in a stroller, it’s not safe yet for her to just walk next to me and hold my hand. Too many cars, too many people. I tried to explain it to her but she wouldn’t listen. So, we had the next tantrum, just as bad as the last one, if not worse. Oh man. You can probably google it and find, “Terrible-two-year-old driving her mom to the edge of insanity in midtown today.” Instagrams and everything. Just kidding. But really, I felt like everyone was just watching it happen and judging me! I should have put out a container to collect their money for the show we were putting on in the street. “Come see Diva Eva take down her mother! Who do you think will win?”
It took me a while. I had candy in my stroller, because at times I’ll bribe her to get in her stroller if she deserves it. But she didn’t deserve any treat and I didn’t want her to think she could get a piece of candy after acting like that. Guys, it was so hard to not give her that candy. Oh man. Okay, anyway, I took a breather and Eva could tell I was upset, stopped screaming and asked why I was sad. She looked so concerned. I told her that her screaming made me very sad and her hitting hurt me. She said she was sorry. But she still didn’t want to get in her seat. Then I finally thought of something. She responded well when she knew I was hurt and sad. She didn’t understand what it meant when I said I wanted her to be safe on the street. Instead of repeating the safety lecture, I told her she would get hurt by the people on the street if she walked because they are so big and she’s so little. All of a sudden, it connected. “Big people hurt me?!” I mean, it wasn’t a lie. They might actually hurt her, on accident, since they walk so fast and aren’t looking where they’re going. So, I just went with it. “Yes, Eva.” Then up she went. She got in the stroller. It was a miracle, I thought T.J. was going to have to leave work and save me.
After getting me some much needed diet coke and Eva taking a nap, she woke up this afternoon and tried to recount to me how the big people hurt her in the street. Hahaha oh gosh. She’s going to tell her daddy people hurt her in the city and he’s going to be so confused.
Anyway, sorry for writing all of that out. But I want to remember today. When I have another bad day I can remember that one time when Eva lost it on 34rd street! I’m sure it’ll give me a little laugh.
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I got some really great tips today from other moms! Thanks for your help and motivation. They’re too good not share with you all, especially Danica’s tip!
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