Pits

As in: armpits. Gross, I know, but it’s a humorous story.

When I was a freshman in high school, I had a horrible problem. I sweated excessively in my underarm region. T.J. calls it hot dog buns, I call it pitting. Call it whatever you’d like. What it was in reality, was pure agony.

It controlled my life. I’m not exaggerating this time. I couldn’t wear certain types of fabric because some would show it more than others. I would wear lots of layers so you wouldn’t see the sweaty arm pits, but in return, it would make me hotter, which would make me sweat more, and then the problem would continue. I’d stand in front of my closet and cry in the mornings searching for something to wear but know that nothing would stop this awful pitting.

Let me paint you an even bigger picture. I’m sitting on my couch watching TV. (Studies have shown that watching TV takes the least amount of energy, even less than sleeping). So I’m being as lazy as one could possibly be, but my arm pits would literally soak my shirt.

Disgusting.

Once in English class it had gone through my cardigan (notice the layers), so I decided to take it off and try to dry out my ol’ T-shirt and cool off a bit. My friend asked me if she could wear my cardigan because she was cold. She put it on and about 30 seconds later, she took it off and asked if I had spilled water on it. I didn’t know what to say,I just beat around the bush searching for some reasonable answer that wouldn’t humiliate my delicate freshman soul.

This went on through my senior year of high school. By this time I knew I had to get help. I had to get medicine. I had to get surgery. I had to do ANYTHING to solve this incessant irritation. Cut out my armpits if you have to, I just couldn’t take it any longer!

So, my mom talked to the pharmacist and she was able to pick up some of this magic deodorant. It’s called Certain Dri, aka Miracle-in-a-Bottle. (Mom’s always know what to do, don’t they?)

Now correct me if I’m wrong, but from what I remember, it doesn’t just deodorize and antipersperate (spelling?), it actually SHRINKS your pores so they don’t sweat as much. Or something like that, I’m not a scientist. All I know is that it worked. I had to use it continually for a few months. And usually after putting it on right after shaving, I’d have to sleep with ice packs under my arm pits because of the burning. But I didn’t care.

It solved my life. It cured my ailment.

Why share this gross story with you? Well, I want to let everyone know that you can get help! Let Certain Dri be the remedy you’ve been seeking for so you can live your life in peace!!!
0 replies
  1. lbryce
    lbryce says:

    Katie, this is seriously the story of my and my friend’s high school experience. her name was Ashlynn. I hope she never sees this. But, yes, I still have certain dri and will always be a fan. Maybe we should be friends or something?.

    Reply
  2. lbryce
    lbryce says:

    Katie, this is seriously the story of my and my friend’s high school experience. her name was Ashlynn. I hope she never sees this. But, yes, I still have certain dri and will always be a fan. Maybe we should be friends or something?.

    Reply
  3. lbryce
    lbryce says:

    Katie, this is seriously the story of my and my friend’s high school experience. her name was Ashlynn. I hope she never sees this. But, yes, I still have certain dri and will always be a fan. Maybe we should be friends or something?.

    Reply

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