Wrapping Up September

Finn loves wearing our shoes. I loved this little number he threw together.

Finn was scared when watching a show one night and kept covering his face like this.

I made a lot of freezer meals in September, it’s been so nice!

HIGH Fitness fun with friends.

Nearly every day, we’d wake up, ride bikes, have lunch outside, go to school, come home from school, then play outside until bedtime. It was the best. I feel like I got nothing done, but it was amazing getting to enjoy the weather outside with friends, see the kids just take off riding their bikes (they got so good!), and not watch any TV in September.

The kids loved/hated this creepy clown vinyl on our neighbor’s window and went to check it out about 20 times a day, every day.

I hosted a clothing swap with a few college friends in September and this is what was LEFT after all of us took tons. I have practically a brand new wardrobe! Thanks, Danica!

Eva wore this outfit tons. She was going to be a witch for Halloween until a few days before Halloween, at which point she changed her mind thirty times.

I took some family friends who were in town to This is the Place park and then Temple Square. I loved learning the history of this beautiful state!

More HIGH classes!

Wrapping Up August

Lots of HIGH Fitness classes.

Crazy hair, dirty feet, popsicle stains… summer nights in a nutshell.

Kindergarten Open House

I was pretty worried I wouldn’t be able to get Finn out of that seat. We love having the museum so close!

POOL DAYZ 4 EVR

Having Daddy at the pool is the bomb dot com.

Getting a little boogie board action

Adobe Outdoor Movie Night

Twinsies with Gramps

Eva got a bunk bed!

Handsome boy at church

My pretty girl in her Sunday best

Hit up Natalie’s class… she was awesome!

New haircut for a big boy!

MTC Tour

We may have looked like a circus with three adults and six kids, five of which are two or under, but we all got to tour the new MTC buildings-where the missionaries for our church are trained before they head out all over the world. The Spirit I felt there even with my noisy kids was unbelievable. I was reminded of the simple truths our gospel is built on… there is a God, He knows us, He loves us, and He’s aware of our efforts. He’s rooting for us… and as a mother to young children, that is something I need to always remember.
After the tour, we went to BYU’s campus and stopped by the office where we three worked and became bffs years ago!

It’s been ten years since I started BYU and it’s always so much fun showing one of my favorite places to these kiddos of mine!

Wrapping Up July

Okay this first one is actually end of June, but he is just so cute with his buzz haircut, I had to include it.

I went to see Wonder Woman with these wonder women! Such a fun GNO!

Two of my friends from Jersey were in town so we got to meet up at a birthday party!

Fun days at the mall! You can’t really tell from this picture but Eva got that shirt at the mall from her grandparents and the sequins can change direction to spell out “hi” or “bye.” She is obsessed… and maybe so am I!

I cannot believe July is over. It was nonstop fun though. End of June we went to Bear Lake for five days. Two days later was 4th of July. Two days later we went to Kentucky for ten days. Five days later we went to St. George for three days. That day, my parents came to town for five days. So, yes. Kind of a crazy, but awesome July! Here’s to August! I’m ready to spend our days at the pool and splash pads and do some serious back to school shopping for my KINDERGARTENER!!!

A Saturday at BYU

My friend Hannah was in town a few weeks ago and she needed a few things from the BYU bookstore, so we all headed down there and walked around campus reminiscing. It was the first time Finn has walked around campus, and I loved thinking about him and Eva one day going to the same college their parents went to. Go cougars!

7 Years

We had our 7 year anniversary on May 22nd. We didn’t do much on that day to celebrate since we had just gone to Arizona, but we did go on a date that weekend to the Gateway for dinner. TJ sure is a catch!

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Push through the nap.

Occasionally we have days where the weather is just too perfect or we have something really fun planned smack dab in the middle of Finn’s nap time so we decide to skip it and just push through! 95% of the time it’s worth it. We don’t do it often, but on the days we do, we make memories. One Monday TJ was out of town and I took the kids to a new park and walking trail. Then I had promised to take Eva to pick out a new toy for completing her positivity/no fuss chart which led us to the mall play place. And then instead of heading home and having Finn take a late nap, I just kept driving west instead of getting on i-15 N and took the kids to the lake. The bugs were horrendous but it was sooooo gorgeous down there!

When I first had Eva and became a mom, I was incredibly strict with routines/schedules. That first summer TJ was gone and so I really stuck to it because it was the only way I had some sanity in my life. And as much as I believe structure and routines are SO good and extremely necessary for kids, I also a huge believer in getting out of your comfort zones, occasionally throwing out those routines, and just living in the moment when the moment calls! So find that balance! You won’t regret it!

Wrapping Up April

Somehow April is over and May will be over in a week! Here are the rest of the photos from the month that didn’t get their own blog post!

We watched tons of Jazz basketball games in April as they made it to the playoffs. TJ even got to attend one of the games on the sixth row!

Finn had a really bad cold early April, double ear infection in both ears! TJ’s parents watched Eva for me one whole day which was such a relief. When we picked her up, Finn did a little mowing.

We got a cilantro plant from the dollar section at Target. It grew so incredibly fast, then died. I don’t know if we overwatered it or what, but that was very short lived. I was so excited and then crushed to get rid of it.

Eva’s fancy outfit. She even is wearing pink high heels.

The last photo I have of Finn with his classic two bottom teeth smile. He got a lot of new teeth in April.

She’s always dressed up so fancy. This one is a blanket style train.

I can’t get this photo to turn right now, oh well. But they spent every sunny day outside!

A new hair style I tried out on Eva. I thought it was so cute!

Ready to watch Moana… aka “NANA”!

So Behind!

I kind of have put blogging on the back burner recently but since I use this as my journal, I really need to catch up! We had to stay at home from church today because we’re not feeling too hot and want to be 100% for Eva’s graduation tomorrow, so I thought I’d use the time to get caught up here! But we have been good! Very busy but using each warm day for fun adventures, even if that just means getting out the water table. TJ went out of town a few times in the past month, which always has its trials but I’m so glad he’s doing well at work and really enjoys what he is doing. And tomorrow is our 7 year anniversary, if you can believe it! So, life is good and I’m grateful!

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Let’s Forget the Bad

I’ve been having a hard week or two with Eva. I use my blog as my journal, and I’m hoping that one day I’ll read this and remember how this was just a bump in the road. I’m also writing this in hopes maybe someone out there has gone through the same thing with their kid and can tell me IT’S JUST A PHASE. YOU’RE DOING GREAT. LIFE WILL GET BACK TO NORMAL. SYLYB!

You know how when you have a baby and they’re teething, and all of a sudden one day they’re completely different? Finn is this way right now. Suddenly, my happy sweet boy who typically is so easy, cries all the time, and I’m like, what’s going on??? Why is he being so awful? Then I feel a new tooth in his mouth and I realize there’s a reason for the hard day. Well, it’s just like that. Except Eva isn’t teething so I have no idea what’s going on. I want to blame it on a growth spurt. Is that still a thing that affects their behavior when they’re five? I need to get my parenting books out.

Well, today was the worst day we’ve had so far with all this going on. And it definitely will go down in the top five hardest days that I have ever had as a parent. I don’t want to talk about the details, I just want to forget them and move on.

Part of me is thinking, what is going on with her? Where did my Eva go? But the other part is thinking, I literally failed as a mom today. And I know we all say that casually from time to time. But no. Today I failed.

Before church, in the middle of one of the tantrums that seemed to never end, I went to my room and fell to my knees just pleading for help. Pleading for patience. Pleading to become the mom my kids deserve. I was able to calm down and eventually get Eva to calm down so we could make it to church, but later tonight, it all happened again. But now she is in bed for the night and I feel emotionally spent. Checked out. Overwhelmed with guilt. Thinking of how I acted, how I reacted, how I wish I would have acted. 

I was watching some Mormon Messages tonight once I put the kids to sleep and I came across one about Mary, the mother of Jesus, and all that she went through. I can’t imagine the burden she must have felt as a mom. Although Jesus was perfect, I’m guessing that when he was a young child, Mary most likely had many days of feeling like the way I’m feeling right now. She probably felt even worse because she knew of His divine calling. And I guess that’s the hard part, though, we know of our children’s potential. I know my children were born in this time for a reason. They are to be strong, resilient, and righteous. And I’ve got to do all that I can while they’re growing up to lead them in the right way. Am I doing all that I can? Am I doing my best? Am I setting a good example myself? We can only take it a day at a time, right? But tomorrow I’m going to be better, because they deserve it.

Being a mom is hard. If it’s not teething, it’s tantrums. If it’s not tantrums, it’s teenagers… I’m sure this will never end as long as I’m a mother, but I just hope that I can handle it better in the future. I want to feel accomplished and strong at the end of the day. So wish me luck. And please, any tips are so appreciated!